The Doctor will see you.......sometime

It’s always the way isn’t it?

You make a doctor’s appointment for something….and by the time you get an appointment….whatever it is, has either gone, or isn’t half as bad as it was…and you feel like a fraud when you walk in.

I had an appointment booked in for yesterday for a sore shoulder….which cleared up…so I tried to call in the morning to cancel, and it was one of those computerised options….you know…."press 1 for halitosis", 1, "Eeeuuuuhhhh you’ve got manky breath."

Now I cursed myself because I was using one of the other phones in the house which is an antique bell telephone.

If you ever watch something like Poirot or Miss Marple…and they’re in an old fashioned hotel where the butler brings out a big black rotary dial telephone on a silver platter for the guest to take the call…..it’s one of them. They’re great…but of absolutely no use whatsoever when you’re asked to press 1 on your phone. It just kept playing through the options…..and it was only then hat I heard it.

"Thank you for calling the surgery…in order to assist us directing your call please listen to the following options carefully. If your call is regarding appointments…please press 1. If you are phoning for test results or to speak to a nurse…please press 2….if you are calling in an emergency….please press 3.

IN AN EMERGENCY!!!

Can you imagine…."Oh damn ….press 3…." ....you’re already holding the phone with the hand you didn’t lose in the accident….whilst trying to stem the flow of blood with your teeth.